Life-altering experiences affect different people in different ways. I used to be a rock climber. Once a year, a group of us would make the trek from Minneapolis, MN to Devil’s Tower, WY. We’d train for these expeditions at an indoor climbing gym. One evening, I was tired and skipped a bolt near the top of a route. After pulling a lot of slack to clip into the final bolt, I missed and dropped 25 feet before slamming into the wall a mere 8 ft. above the ground. From that point forward, my hands would sweat every time I thought of climbing. (my keyboard is getting slimy even as I type!)

Severely traumatic experiences make my palms sweat. When I think about driving in the car with a crying baby, my hands start sweating. I used to actually shake, but years of self-guided meditation has cured me of that. How can mere noise cause such savage fear? You know how babies are supposed to fall asleep in the car? Well mine didn’t. I was destined to give birth to not one, but three car-screamers.

If you were blessed with a baby that falls asleep to the steady thrum of wheels on pavement, well, good for you.

But if you, like me, tremble at the thought of being confined in the car with a crying baby, read on, sister. I literally pulled what sparse hair I had from my head. I wept and gnashed my teeth. I actually broke into a cold sweat when I heard the click of the infant seat snapping into its base. For those of you who think I’m exaggerating, I’m not. Daily errands were truly the bane of my existence as a new mother.

But it got better with babies #2 and #3. I learned tricks to quiet the baby or distract myself (and fellow passengers) from the cacophony of sound emitting from the tiny being sitting behind me.

Tip #1: Have a plan

This is your job. You are a mother now, and you need to figure out how to thrive, not just survive. Having a strategy makes all the difference.

Tip #2: Get creative

If your attempts to sooth your baby aren’t working, try something else. My mother assumed that all babies responded to the calming effects of classical music. My middle child preferred techno music with obnoxiously heavy base. She also calmed down when everyone in the car sang Zippity Doo Dah at full volume. Finding out what works for your baby might take a bit of trial and error. But it’s well worth the effort.

Tip #3: Look for a cause

If your baby is normally calm but becomes fussy in the car, look for the root of the problem. Some babies get motion sickness when facing backwards. With your pediatrician’s approval, try some ginger drops. You may also want to look at the car seat itself. My chiropractor told me that many car seats cause an unnatural curve in a baby’s spine, which can become irritating after time. This is especially true if you are traveling on gravel or bumpy roads.

Tip #4: Find activities that don’t require props

When my oldest daughter was 6 months old, I drove alone with her for 10 hours to visit my parents in Minnesota. Despite MAJOR pre-trip anxiety (mine, not hers), we actually had a great time, but it wasn’t without effort and creativity. Armed with a bag of 20-30 toys, I figured I had the entertainment thing licked. But I soon learned that toys weren’t going to cut it. Everything I handed her invoked a happy little coo, but was tossed out of the car seat within 20 seconds. Sitting with an empty toy bag (and very messy back seat), I came up with some more lasting ways to keep her entertained without toys.

• Talk to her about everything you do and see.  Be your baby’s personal narrator, explaining the world as it unfolds around her.
• Consonant / vowel combinations: Starting at the beginning of the alphabet, combine each consonant with each vowel sound. i.e. baa, bay, beh, bee, bih, bye, bah, bow, buh, boo.  This simple exercise often calms babies while introducing them to the basic phonetic components of language.
• Animal noises: Use a full sentence to pair animal names with the sound they make.  For example: “What does a dog say?  Woof, woof”  If you’re feeling musically inclined, go ahead and belt out a chorus of “Old MacDonald Had a Farm”
• Nursery rhymes and songs: Build your repertoire with children’s audio tapes and CD’s.  It’s amazing how much children learn from these little rhymes and songs.

You are your baby’s best toy. Explore how many ways you can feed your baby’s hungry mind.

Tip #5: When nothing will entertain your baby, go ahead and entertain yourself

It matters not what fellow drivers and passing pedestrians think. If chair dancing makes you feel good, go ahead and do it. Keep an indulgent treat in your diaper bag just to get yourself grounded. Deep breathing, chanting, whistling, singing, shouting (happily, of course!), eating… focus on something that makes you feel good. ‘Cause when mama feels good, everyone feels good!

Set Realistic Expectations

If you are accustomed to arriving at grandma’s house in nine hours flat with nary a break for potty or food, you’ll have to accept the fact that traveling with a baby has nothing in common with the Indy 500. You should expect to stop every hour and a half to two hours, unless the fates decide to bless you with a sleeping child. If you are so favored by the powers that be, neither empty gas tank nor full bladder, ravaging hunger nor even Starbucks shall tempt you to disturb the slumber of your precious cherub. It is law. Truly. I’m not even kidding.

Safety First

I KNOW I don’t need to do the car seat lecture. Any parent with the sense to use the internet to research tips for traveling with a baby wouldn’t need to be told that car seats are mandatory. Laws become a little looser when it comes to nursing. Until early 2009, Michigan allowed a child to be out of their car seat while nursing. Michigan recently closed this loophole, but several other states allow mothers to be unbuckled while breast feeding an infant in a car seat.

In light of the gymnastics required to pull off this maneuver (not to mention the entertainment for passing truckers), an extended car trip might be the time to consider offering a bottle or pacifier.  If your baby is at the stage where nipple confusion is of great concern, you’ll need to plan frequent stops and be prepared to endure baby’s restlessness.

Motion Sickness

We were destined to have three children who howled the moment their little bottoms touched the car seat. To this day, I am convinced that sitting in a rear-facing seat brought on bouts of motion sickness. Though there are not many remedies for very young children, several natural motion sickness cures are safe and effective for older babies. These include:

• Solaray chewable Ginger Trips
• Queasy Pops for kids
• Crystallized ginger
• CanTravel dissolvable granules by Native Remedies

See these and other motion sickness items at the Baby Travel Store

Entertaining a Pre-Verbal Child

It’s helpful to have a game plan when it comes to keeping your baby entertained.  Despite the armload of dollars you’ve dropped on sophisticated items to keep your baby intellectually engaged, you are your baby’s best toy.  There are a number of games you can play to both entertain and feed your baby’s hungry mind. Use your creativity to expand upon these ideas.

• Be your baby’s personal narrator, explaining the world as it unfolds around him.
• Consonant / vowel combinations: Starting at the beginning of the alphabet, combine each consonant with each vowel sound. i.e. baa, bay, beh, bee, bih, bye, bah, bow, buh, boo.  In spite of the fact that you sound like a simpleton, this exercise calms babies while introducing them to the basic phonetic components of language.
• Animal noises – For those who require an example: “What does a dog say? Woof, woof”.  The musically inclined might opt for a rousing chorus of  “Old McDonald”.
• Nursery rhymes and songs: Amazon and iTunes have a full range of children’s selections in virtually  every musical genre.  My all-time favorite is “Dr. Jean and Friends”, however my middle child was partial to techno music.  To each his own!
• Put on a finger puppet show.
• String Cheerios, knotting the ends of the string.  Tie one side to the handle above the door and let baby work to get the Cheerios off.  This game is a little messy, so you might want a rechargeable handheld vacuum on hand.  Make sure the string isn’t long enough for baby to get it around her neck.
• Blow bubbles for baby (if you’re not driving, of course!)
• Give baby a new board book – our favorites are the Black on White books by Tana Hoban and anything written by Eric Carle.
• Babies are quickly bored with their toys.  If you can rotate through a nice selection of Whoozits, keys, mirrors, empty water bottles, teething rings, wrist rattles, and anything that makes noise, you will always have something in the arsenal to keep baby busy.

Car travel is one of those things that gets better with time.  If your lot in life includes a fussy little traveler, rest assured that like all things baby, this too shall pass.